We were together up until a couple of months ago, while I’m still married to my second husband, while I’m still in Vegas with Lil Wayne. All this is going on at the same time.

My first husband [Darius McCrary] and I were good friends for like eight years before we started dating, then we got married and that marriage was tumultuous. It ended in divorce but we were still living together after our divorce, then all of a sudden I up and married someone last year unbeknownst to [Darius], just so I could end that relationship. The person that I’m married to now, I don’t even know this person. It was really just for show.

Yeah, it was very difficult to break those ties. But that didn’t even work because my first husband came back. People can say what they want to say about me, but I’ve had more husbands than women have had boyfriends. Men either marry a whore or cheat on his wife with one. You gotta cook, clean, fuck, suck, do everything and do it very well, and men will want you forever; I can’t shake Darius to save my fucking life. Wayne has been in my life this whole time.

Wayne and I have kept a relationship through my two husbands, his three kids, three additional baby mamas, three of his albums, three of my books, three of his arrests, one year in prison and three engagements on his part. We are indestructible and I find it fascinating. I’m in constant contact with this person every day, every other day. He is a part of my being. I’m not me without him. He makes me very happy, [but] I couldn’t be with Wayne. I couldn’t live Wayne’s life.

I woke up in the middle of the night and I felt weird. I looked at my phone and had all these missed calls and messages. Some of them were from people that were in Wayne’s camp. My whole body started shaking because I didn’t know what happened yet. I had to go online and read it because no one was getting back to me right away, of course. I [remember] standing in the bathroom reading about him being sick online and me being really scared. I was in the bathroom pacing until I got the text message back from him, and I just started crying. I got one message back from him and he says, ‘Babe, I’m OK.’ Everyday after that we’ve been a little closer. That relationship is everything to me, but it’s not what people think it is. It’s not sexual and it’s not financial. It is very spiritual and he’s like my battery pack. When I’m down, when I’m in a really rough space, he always pulls me out of that and he has no idea what he’s done for me.